Tag Archives: Victims of Domestic Violence

Speak Life and Not Death

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2Romans 10:9-10(NIV)
“9 If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.”

From the time that he was able to understand words, Kayden’s mother has taught him the Word of God. He’s eight now. He’s a stellar student, well behaved, and encourages his classmates with the scriptures whenever he feels led by the Spirit to do so. While playing on the beach this summer, another eight-year-old boy came up and asked Kayden if he wanted to play. He remembered the words of his mom, telling him that meeting new people is never by chance; it’s an opportunity to introduce someone new to Jesus Christ. After playing a little while, this is exactly what Kayden did. He spoke the words of Romans 10:9-10 perfectly and asked the little boy if he wanted Jesus Christ to be his Lord and Savior. The little boy said, “Yes, I accept Jesus!” And that’s all it took for a seed to be planted.

It’s almost as if children come out of the womb these days with a sense of purpose and a level of maturity that folks our age never had. It astonishes us. The acumen for technology and a faster pace of life seems to be already programmed into them. They’re smart, and this is by God’s design. They are able to handle the truth at a much earlier age, and God means for us, as parents, guardians, and relatives, to take advantage of that and teach them the Word early.

The world is increasingly complex and challenging to navigate, and it will become even more so if the Lord should tarry. Children today must be equipped, so that they can discern a trick from a blessing. They must be wise, and more importantly, they must be saved.

Proverbs 18:21(NIV) says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” At eight years old, Kayden knew the power of his tongue. He recognized an opportunity to open his mouth and speak life, and even if the little boy had rejected Jesus, Kayden’s reward is still great. Our Master Jesus spoke these words in Matthew 12:33-37(NIV), “33 Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. 34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. 35 A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36 But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” Kayden bore fruit that glorious day, and he did so because of the goodness that was planted in his heart by the Holy Spirit. He is a good tree that brought forth good fruit. The same should be said of every believer in Christ.

Many of us have developed a pattern of making the wrong choice when it comes to what we allow out of our mouths. We confess negativity and are profane in our conversations, and in this way, we are choosing to speak death and not life. That habit is keeping us separated from the blessing we seek. We’ve been praying for marriage but have never led another person into salvation. We’ve never witness the Word to anyone, and sometimes it is because we are ashamed of the Gospel. We say that we don’t know the Bible well enough. Well, Kayden is eight! He hasn’t read the whole Bible, but he knew enough of the Word to make a difference in someone’s life, and he was committed to speak what he knew. God holds us accountable for doing the same.

2Corinthians 5:20(NIV) says, “We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.” This is who we are if we’ve been saved by the blood of the lamb. We’re ambassadors of Jesus Christ! This is the highest office any of us could ever hope to hold. We’re here on this earth on a mission, but if we’re blatantly honest, some of us haven’t thought of ourselves in this way. Even if we met the future spouse ten minutes from now, we would not be a witness of the Gospel in his life. Some women wouldn’t even think to prioritize the privilege of introducing him to the Lord Jesus Christ. It would be the last thing on their minds. For those women, God knows what is in their hearts. He knows that they will not bear fruit because they won’t make their commitment to Him and His Word known to the new man. They would not live out that commitment as a witness and testimony to God’s goodness before the new man’s eyes.

We have missed tons of opportunities to do what Kayden did, and some of us have simply never thought about the reality that we owe God an apology for this. He has called us out from among the world and has commanded that our lives be employed for His glory, but some of us simply haven’t heeded God’s call. We haven’t bore fruit or given Him anything significant to reward. This can be changed, and we ought to make that change a priority. Our tongue is designed by God to be an instrument of profound change. It can be a life-saving tool if we speak words of life and not death. Pray that you will never miss an opportunity to be a witness of God’s Word again. As you are moved by the Spirit, tell people about the Gospel of Jesus Christ! Demonstrate to God and all of heaven that your stand upon His Word is strong enough to lay out the welcome mat for your future spouse into the body of Christ and into your life as well.■

Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

 “Speak Life and Not Death”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

A Clean Heart Creates a New You

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Ezekiel 36:26-27(NLT)
“26 And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you so that you will follow my decrees and be careful to obey my regulations.”

Our Lord is in no short supply of blessings and riches, and it is His good pleasure to lavish them on His children. We can see this so clear in Ezekiel 36:26-27, as He beautifully illustrates the level of His power and grace. In Old Testament times, God chose the Israelites as His very special people. He made a covenant with them. He would be their God and they agreed to follow His statues, rules, and laws. Following His Word allowed them to be covered under His protection and provision, but they would not keep their end of the covenant and began to practice idolatry. This betrayal against God landed them in serious hot water. They turned their hearts away from Him and had no desire to obey, but God had a plan to do the exceedingly abundantly. He always does, and this is a truth that we can rest in with a heart and mind full of unwavering faith.

Even after countless miracles and blessings, the children of Israel strayed away from God. They didn’t represent Him among the other nations, and those nations were cursing our Heavenly Father’s name and speaking lies about Him. He was not going to stand for that. During this period in the Old Testament, His people had stony hearts towards Him. They refused to listen to our Heavenly Father and chose to go their own way, but He had a plan. In this passage in Ezekiel 36:26-27, He speaks to His people through His prophet, Ezekiel, and tells them that a day is coming when He will no longer write His Word upon tablets of stone, but upon the hearts of those who love and honor Him.

Some believers living today have done what the children of Israel did, they have developed a hard heart towards God and His Word. They are listening to the world and disconnecting from the truth, and there’s a price to pay for this. The Israelites of the Old Testament were not sons and daughters of God the way that we are. They were servants of God, so there’s a huge difference between those living in Old Testament times and believers living today. We have received an enormous gift from God. We have been empowered through His Holy Spirit, and we have a greater responsibility to live by the rules of God’s Kingdom and follow the example of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Because of what God accomplished through Jesus Christ, we have received God’s seed, the gift of the Holy Spirit, and he lives inside us! 1Corinthians 6:19-20(NLT) says, “19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”

Through the Holy Spirit, God has given us a new heart that is tender and responsive to Him, and it is our privilege and responsibility to nurture our hearts with His Word every chance we get. Philippians 2:13(NLT) says, “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” This is what God’s Holy Spirit does. He works within our body temples and gives us both the desire and power to do the things that please God. Jesus Christ also tells us in John 16:13 that the Spirit will lead and guide us to all truth! With this exciting good news, we must also understand that yes, the Spirit is working in us, and yes, he will guide us into the truth, but he will not go against our free-will and make us comply with his leadership and direction.

In Proverbs 4:23(ESV), God tells us to “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” We are the keepers of our own hearts, and we must make the choice to surrender to the Spirit. Sometimes we don’t do this because we have not kept our hearts through God’s Word. As His beloved children, we always have to put ourselves in check. Have you noticed the condition of your heart lately? Has anyone mentioned something about your attitude or behavior that needs changing? Are you aware of how quickly you get upset when something doesn’t go your way? How do you handle not being the one in control?

We can be very petty and picky, and we can have an attitude that looks nothing like the attitude of Christ. We must be blatantly honest and examine whether things like these are holding us back. It would be a mistake to think that we can walk by faith while still resisting change. We must be flexible, pliable, and humble to God’s Will, and we must nurture our minds and hearts with His Word.

We can’t listen to what others think is right, we must know what is right according to what God says. If we have any question about this, the Spirit will straighten us right on out. Cynicism and pessimism can take root in us if we’re not careful, and when they are in our hearts, they draw the situations and people that latch on and keep us from growing and going higher. 2Corinthians 5:17(NLT) tells us, “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!” Because of his sacrifice and resurrection, Jesus Christ has given us the Holy Spirit, and the Spirit has made us a new person. We can’t allow people to take us back to those old stuck in the mud ways. We must keep our eyes on Christ and follow where he leads us through the Spirit.

Jesus Christ has made a ‘new you’ possible! This is the ‘new you’ that must be presented to your future spouse! You’ve been empowered to love yourself and others through his love, and this makes all the difference in our relationships. God made good on the Word He gave to His prophet, Ezekiel. He’s given us a new heart, and we are responsible for keeping our hearts responsive to Him and pliable to the plan He has for our lives. His love is deep and everlasting, and we must be confident that His promise of a new heart and a new life in Christ is all the hope we need to usher in new blessings in our lives.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“A Clean Heart Creates a New You”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Making Room for the Blessing

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Admitting that our lives have become cluttered is not something we want to face; but admitting that our souls are equally cluttered is a definite hands-off for most of us. We’ve heard a bunch of brilliant teachings on faith and prayer, and we’ve gone through enough of life’s ups and downs to know that the hand of God is on us, yet there’s something down deep that we just can’t get to. Jesus Christ has given us his joy. This means we’re supposed to experience a joy that fills our every longing and satisfies our every thirst, however, we’re not there. We’re not there in our souls and we feel the bigness of that absence in every aspect of our existences. Truthfully, we’ve been feeling the absence of the ‘uniquely special’ for a long time. We have to be real about that. The reality that Jesus is our everything is not connecting with us way down deep, and because it isn’t, we’re frustrated, sad, and need something to change in a hurry.

A blatantly honest question we must ask ourselves is whether there’s some clutter down deep that is weighing so heavily on our souls that we’ve never really come up for air. The stress of being single in a very cold and uncaring world; the pain of loss and heartbreak; the sting of disappointment after disappointment; anxiety, sadness, health challenges, and other chronic stresses; these are just a few of the heavies we’ve endured, and the  leftovers are still with us. Some of us have much more than these. It’s not just one or two things, but multiple residuals from emotionally painful experiences are weighing us down.

Although we’d like to believe that these just melted away after the trauma subsided, that just isn’t the case. If we had a window into our own souls, many of us would be shocked. We would not see the middle or end of it for all the clutter that would block our view. We understand all too well that life is busy, and that we have a call to fulfill and a purpose to perform. We just couldn’t be bothered to slow down, examine, analyze, and comb through. There was no time between working, worshiping, caring for others, and trying to put a smile on our faces. So, the clutter kept silently growing and taking up space, to the point where, as bad as we want newness, there’s no room for it.

Declutter

Now there’s a word, ‘declutter’. The formal definition is to remove unnecessary items from a crowded space. Sounds easy enough. We know how to do it in our homes and other spaces, but when it comes to the soul, many of us consider it an absurd notion. We might think that this bit was handled when we were saved. The truth is that our human spirits were recreated when we became born-again, but our souls were not. 2Corinthians 5:17(NLT) tells us, “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!” This is what happens when we accept Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior. We become a new person because our spirit is recreated and made brand new, but the soul is the business of our free-will. God will not come inside our minds and hearts and start throwing out all the bad thoughts, attitudes, and feelings. Through Christ, He has recreated our human spirits. He made them brand new and placed His Holy Spirit inside them. With all that power inside us, He commands us in Ephesians 4:23 to get busy renewing our minds and making them line up with our new spiritual reality in Christ.

This is our responsibility as followers of Christ, and most of us do this work of renewing our minds and changing our hearts gradually and sometimes it’s slower than life demands. God is extremely patient with us. He doesn’t rush us, but He expects that we will tend to the matters of the soul. He has designed life to cooperate with us when we do, but life has a way of sounding its alarm when we don’t.

The alarm

Many of us have been praying for quite some time to receive a particular blessing that is very dear to our hearts. We might be thinking that God is causing a delay, but that isn’t true. Life is sounding the alarm about what is in our souls. Our minds are not at peace, we’re not listening to the Father and releasing the things He’s told us to, and all this clutter is a result of our lack of faith in His ability and willingness to bless us. We have to come to grips with the reality that mentally, emotionally, and physically, we have not made room for the blessing we seek.

In Hebrews 12:1(NLT), through the Apostle Paul, God commands us to “strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up.” In Ephesians 4:24(NLT), He tells us to “Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.” God is not going to do what He tells us to do. He commands us to be obedient and to do the things He says in His Word. We are to strip off the things that hold us back and put on the things that propel us forward and higher. This decluttering of our souls is not a suggestion. It’s not something we can negotiate with God about. The work of the soul is something every believer must do.

The questions

Some of us have never asked the Lord, “What is holding me back?” or “What must I do to show You I’m ready for what you have in store?” We can become so closed off in our routines that we are walking in circles, not recognizing that the journey of releasing and surrendering must begin. It has too. It’s a journey we all must take. Some of our behaviors—the way we think, our attitudes about life—must change, and it is a healthy and necessary process to pray about this, seek the Lord continually, and be led by His Holy Spirit to deal with some internal blockers.

We’re challenged because our lives are so busy, and the luxury of actually sitting with ourselves and looking at ourselves through the lens of God’s Word is one that many of us have neglected. Whether it’s fear of hurt and heartbreak, addictions, obsessions, negative attitudes, deep sadness, or any other thing that boxes us in, all of these can weigh us down and keep us separated from what we desire. Trust with all your heart that if God tells you to release something, indeed you can release it. So, let nothing keep you from the change the Lord desires you to make. Begin the journey and let Him lead you through it. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Making Room for the Blessing”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Your Life Means So Much to God

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1Peter 4:10-12(NLT)
“10 God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. 11 Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen. 12 Dear friends, don’t be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you.”

How do we make our lives work from day to day? How do we make them fulfilling, and full of contentment and peace? Many of us struggle with this question. We don’t exactly know what will truly make us happy, but God knows. He starts with helping us to understand that we are not random beings moving throughout our days with no direction. We have a purpose in God’s Will and Plan! Ephesians 1:11(ESV) reveals, “In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will.” Long before we entered our mother’s wombs, God knew us and made a plan for our lives. He has done this because He loves us and desires to work within us for His glory!

2Timothy 1:9(NLT) says, “For God saved us and called us to live a holy life. He did this, not because we deserved it, but because that was his plan from before the beginning of time–to show us his grace through Christ Jesus.” Our Heavenly Father delights in us! He’s blessed us so richly because of His amazing grace, and that grace has been poured out on us through Jesus Christ! This was God’s plan all along, from the very beginning. There’s nothing that you and I can do to alter His wonderful plan. He invites us to position ourselves in it so we can receive all that He has in store.

Our issue is that our minds and hearts are so distracted with what is going on in the world that we are not looking in God’s direction. He has told us that our lives must be saturated with the example and love of Jesus Christ, but many of us are too busy imitating those we see in the world. I know women that are always comparing themselves to one another and trying to measure up to how their favorite celebrities look. They don’t understand that this is taking them away from God’s purpose. Romans 8:5(ESV) says, “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit.”

This life doesn’t afford us the time to be distracted. We have a purpose and a call to fulfill, and this requires us to be hearers and doers of God’s Word. Jesus Christ makes it plain to us in Matthew 4:4(ESV), “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.” God’s Word is our manna. It is the bread that causes us to prosper and flourish. So many of us complain that we don’t know our purpose and what we’re supposed to be doing for God’s Kingdom. James 4:2-3(NLT) addresses this and gives us the remedy. It says, “2 You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it. 3 And even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong–you want only what will give you pleasure.”

We must read and study God’s Word so that we know how to live in a way that pleases Him. This passage in James 4:2-3 makes it clear that we can’t go to the wrong source and expect to find a right solution. We must go to the Source that has all the answers and all the power to solve any issue we may face. We must go to God with our questions about our existences, because He alone has the plan for our lives, and He will tell us, but our hearts must be right. Our motives are all wrong when we go to God with questions about our purpose in His Will and Plan but have no desire or commitment to carry out what He reveals.

Some of us are so busy trying to look like the images of women we see in social media that we are missing the heart that God requires. We’ve got to switch up and put more focus on seeking Him than we do any other thing.

When I was not so busy with the responsibilities I have now, me and my group of my friends hung out together a lot. One of them is a fashionista, and she knew how to put outfits together and make them look like she stepped off a runway. Another friend was a great orator. Her diction was perfect, and she could speak in front of a crowd without missing a beat, she’s fearless. While another friend has a beautiful singing voice. I used to measure myself next to all of them, and sometimes I felt like there was nothing unique about me, but never again will I do that. Knowing that I mean so much to God, that He alone holds the plan for my life, and that His love is the thing that makes me special has made all the difference in how I see myself. Jesus Christ gave his life on the cross to save me from hell, and this makes me as worthy of God’s love as everyone else.

We can’t try to mold ourselves into being someone other than who God has made us. God warns us in Romans 12:2(NLT), “2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” He wants to transform us into the image of His dear Son, Jesus Christ. So, don’t miss out on what God has for you by becoming distracted by others, or what’s going on around you. Our lives mean so much to our Heavenly Father, and we can be confident that if we focus our attention on becoming more like Christ every day, we will prosper, be blessed and content, and full of God’s peace.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV), The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“Your Life Means So Much to God”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Rest in God’s Shadow

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Psalm 91:1(NLT)
“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”

When you’re in an abusive relationship or household, rest is not something you get very often. Your mind is occupied with all the things it takes for you to survive. Your heart is wrestling to love someone that hurts you, and your soul is troubled with fear about the next time you might have to go through it. You might look like a million bucks on the outside, but on the inside, you’re poised for danger coming at you from all sides. It’s trauma, and believe it or not, many of us have made ourselves used to it.

Our minds tell us that rest comes when the enraged attacker leaves in a fury of anger and for a while, ceases to injure us with verbal and physical abuse, but is that really rest? Is this the peace and quiet we believe we deserve? We thought our marriage or significant relationship would be a place of refuge from the cruel place the world can sometimes be. We thought this person we love or loved so much would embrace us, honor us even, but because of them, an eerie feeling permeates all the crevices of what we thought would be a sacred space. Some of us are blind to the reality that we’ve been tricked by satan. We can’t see that he is using someone close to separate us from peace and rest, that his goal is to steal our joy, imprison us with fear, and attack our faith in God.

If we think deeply about this, we can’t help but come away realizing that this is an incredibly dastardly plot; that someone would dare diminish our God-given right to peace and rest. It’s incredulous that an individual would have the audacity to do this, but this kind of thing is pervasive in our society. Thank God there’s a remedy. There’s a safe place in Christ. Through him there’s a way to restore all that we have lost and to renew ourselves to such a degree that we never again allow anyone to weaponize our capacity to love against us.

God never intended a life to be lived in a continual atmosphere of threat. Living this way is living beneath our privilege as His sons and daughters. It’s harmful to us, and it interferes with the peace, rest, and restoration that our relationship with God offers through Jesus Christ. The remedy is not in getting back at the one who has abused our love and support, and it’s certainly not waiting on them to change. The answer to every question, and the solution to every problem is found in Christ. It’s found in surrendering to him and allowing him entrance into our lives. How do we do this? We do it by faith, by believing that God is greater than our problems and greater than the abuser, and He wants to help us.

In Psalm 91:1, God tells us that those who live in His shelter will find rest in His shadow. This verse is teaching us about God’s covering, security, and provision. When we live in Him, we can expect that He will take care of us. Acts 17:28(ESV) states that “In him we live and move and have our being.” In other words, we go wherever God goes, because we are in Him through Jesus Christ. God is all love and light and does not cast a shadow. The word “shadow” in this verse represents God’s secret places. So, if we follow Him, He’ll provide rest for us in His secret places and put a hedge of protection around us. This is what God will do for those who love and honor Him, and this is where our faith must be, because He never fails, and He always follows through on His promises.  

Again, abuse is not God’s Will for us, and the continuance of it will cause our brain to shift to a gear of constantly responding to abuse, even when the abuser isn’t around. It’s exhausting as one might imagine. Jesus Christ tells us in Matthew 11:28(ESV), “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” As we ponder and soak in the grace and power of this invitation, we must remember that God is our Creator. He knows how we’re supposed to work. 2Corinthians 3:5(ESV) tells us, “Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God.” Our wonderful Heavenly Father created us to rely upon Him completely, because He’s our Heavenly Father and He loves us. We were perfectly designed by Him to walk in the peace and rest that our union with Christ brings. This rest, this peace, cannot be found in any other than Christ, our Lord.

The psalmist wrote in Psalm 4:8(ESV), “In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.” Our Heavenly Father has made it available to rest in Him, where we can be in perfect peace. Pray and ask the Lord to come into your mind and heart. Express your commitment to grow in Christ and surrender totally to him. God loves you, and He values you. He gave His only begotten Son as a sacrifice to save you. Philippians 2:13(ESV) declares, “for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” Surrender your day to Him every morning you’re blessed enough to wake up. Let the Father work in you and place your focus on pleasing Him. Have confidence that when you accept the Father’s invitation and let Him have His way in your life, the outcome is always going to be rest to your soul. ■

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Rest in God’s Shadow”,  written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Turn to the Lord

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Isaiah 55:6-7(NLT)
“6 Seek the LORD while you can find him. Call on him now while he is near. 7 Let the wicked change their ways and banish the very thought of doing wrong. Let them turn to the LORD that he may have mercy on them. Yes, turn to our God, for he will forgive generously.”

One of my good friends called me on New Year’s Eve crying because her significant other bailed on her. They had plans to go out and bring in the New Year with each other, but he said he had to work late and never showed up or called. They’ve been seeing each other for two-years, but for the last couple of months, he’d been distant.

No one would argue that a broken heart is very difficult to overcome, and the only thing you can think about is grabbing on to something to soothe the pain so that you don’t ever feel it again. In my case, after my first bout with a broken heart, I didn’t want to hear anything about meeting another man. I avoided relationships like the plague. Even though I knew I couldn’t remain in solitude forever, I was nervous about meeting someone new. At that time in my life, the thought of having to possibly take a chance with my heart being broken again was too much for my mind to conceive.

As I’ve done so often with the heartaches of my life, I remember something my grandmother told me when I was in my teens. Her words bring me comfort even today. Years ago, I was crying my eyes out when she discovered me. Entering high school, it was my first crush, and boy was his rejection devastating. For weeks, I cried myself to sleep, and the day my grandmother saw me, my eyes were almost swollen shut from crying so much. She told me, “Leave it in God’s hands, baby, He’ll fix it.”  I barely understood the depth of this truth then, but the comfort and reassurance of her words eased my young soul.

Now that I’m much older and have learned to lean on God for strength, I hang on to my grandmother’s encouragement and delve into God’s Word for comfort and solace. Hebrews 4:12(ESV) tells us, “For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” Like many of you, I’ve endured heartbreaks that have taken my breath away, but through it all, nothing can soothe our hearts and restore our souls like God’s Word.

The Word reveals the power of God. It reveals His willingness and ability to use His power and strength for our good. When we turn to Him, He will inspire us with hope and help us see that He has so much more in store for our lives. He knows that when a relationship falls apart, some of us fall apart with it. He wants us to realize that He is our strength and hope. He doesn’t want us falling apart. He doesn’t want us thinking that our lives are diminished or over because someone doesn’t recognize how special we are. God wants us to have hope that we can be better, wiser, and stronger through the Lord Jesus Christ. We must have faith that He can and will turn things around if we turn to Him.

In Deuteronomy 4:29(NLT), God told His people, “But from there you will search again for the LORD your God. And if you search for him with all your heart and soul, you will find him.” God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He tells us in Malachi 3:6 that He does not change. We must seek the Lord with all our hearts. His love is the only remedy for our pain, and He freely gives it to us. So often in life we miss out because we’re not seeking God for His comfort and care. We believed that a person or possession could fill up our empty places. Our Heavenly Father is the only one that can fill our cups to overflowing.

You might think, “Well, I’ve heard things like this about God, but I don’t know how to find Him.” You might think that He won’t hear you because maybe you haven’t done all the right things. The reality is that God knows you better than you know yourself. He’s your Creator, and He wants you to know that you were fearfully and wonderfully made, as the psalmist wrote in Psalm 139:14. We don’t have to be perfect to go to God, we just need to be humble before Him. We need to recognize that we don’t have all the answers, and we need help. He is not far but as near to you as your own heart. Let Him in. Turn to Him and allow Him to turn your life around.■

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Turn to the Lord”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

God’s Grace is Our Paradise

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2Corinthians 12:9(NLT)
“Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.”  So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”

If you listen closely, you can hear the voice of God in this scripture. If you’ve digested it like a good meal and believed it with your whole heart, His Words will reverberate throughout any difficulty you face. We know that there are times in life where difficulties and heartache show up unexpectedly. We cry out to God and ask Him to take away the emotional pain because it can cut like a knife. We expect Him to do so immediately, but we must recognize that when we ask God to take away our emotional pain, we’re asking Him to take away the love as well. That is something that He will not do. However, what He will do is comfort our hearts and take on our burdens. Understand that He also expects us to do our part as well. We must focus our attention on loving Him, so that we can be the overcomers He’s made us in Christ and learn to live and love through His grace.

We need to be strengthened in our conviction that God always keeps His promises. We should hold to the truth of 2Corinthians 12:9 with all that we are, because the truth of God’s promise will encourage you to keep the faith. And make no mistake, at times, it can be a battle in our own hearts and minds to keep the faith, especially where our significant relationships are concerned.

In Proverbs 3:5, God tells us to trust in Him with all our hearts, and He also warns us not to lean on our own understanding. Our Heavenly Father isn’t making a suggestion here. He’s directing us to trust Him with our whole hearts and to steer clear of making decisions and choices without first consulting Him. Huge mistakes happen when we fail to do this. In Proverbs 4:23(NLT), He tells us to “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” God is giving us very simple instruction here. The heart is the source, and He’s telling us that if the heart is polluted, then issues become polluted. So, not guarding our hearts in a way that pleases God will always come back to bite us.

We are the ones in charge of our hearts and minds. God’s warning and instruction in Proverbs 4:23 is to keep our hearts pure, to watch what goes into them and watch what comes out of them. He wants us to learn to guard our hearts, to be careful about who we love and how we love, so that we will not make relationship decisions that work against us rather than for us.

God wants our hearts to be at peace, so that we are kept by Him through any situation. Our problem is that too often we leave God out of the equation. We’re jumping into relationships without His guidance, so when trouble hits, we don’t have the level of faith in Him that we should. Because of His incomparable grace, God wants to help us make the right relationship decisions. He also wants to help us heal and become better when we make the wrong ones, but we must be willing to learn the lesson of His love and grace. This means that we learn to invite Heavenly Father into every aspect of our existence.

God’s grace is His unmerited favor. We can’t do anything to earn it, He gives it freely. God demonstrated His grace toward us through forgiving our sins and giving us salvation through His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ. When our precious Lord was fastened to the cross as a sacrifice for our sins, he prayed for the people that crucified him. Jesus was crucified between two thieves. One of them that hung beside him had a hard heart and scoffed at Jesus, but the other criminal protested and came to Jesus’s defense. Luke 23:42-43(NLT) tells us, “42 Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom.” 43 And Jesus replied, “I assure you, today you will be with me in paradise.” The response of Jesus to this thief is another clear and wonderful example of God’s grace.

We are delivered, saved, and made whole through the grace of God. His grace is our paradise. Instead of taking away our pain, our Heavenly Father desires us to be strengthened through His grace. In other words, God’s grace is our strategy for overcoming any fear, heartache, or troubling condition. Nothing is too big or too hard for our God. Let Him into your pain and give yourself totally to Him. Don’t focus on the pain or hold on to it. Be committed to love greater through Jesus Christ! Focus on God’s grace to strengthen and help you become the person He has predestined you to be. His grace is all you need, and this is always the lesson of victory over any heartache that we endure.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“God’s Grace is Our Paradise”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

God’s Truth is Hidden in Our Hearts

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2Corinthians 12:9(NLT)
“Each time he said, “My grace is all you need.  My power works best in weakness.”  So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”

When Julianne met Mark, she said her heart skipped a beat, and that’s how it felt almost every time she was with him. It wasn’t one of those kinds of things where the attraction slowly sneaks up on you. She was hooked instantly, and because of those internal butterflies fluttering away, she allowed herself to fall for Mark completely. She made him her whole world. Her friends complained about her not spending time with them anymore, and her parents saw a different side of her as well. Julianne assured her loved ones that she was just in love, and they didn’t need to worry. She was head over heels about Mark, and very little else mattered. They texted each other at work throughout the day, and spent just about every available moment together, but after a few months, things changed. Mark was beginning to pull away and gave Julianne no explanation why.

Most of us have a sense of the kind of pain that was waiting for Julianne. We’ve either seen it experienced by someone we know, or we’ve caught a glimpse or more of it ourselves. It can be the most severe emotional pain. It’s like the person we’ve let into our hearts has, with one hand, reached down our throats to our very cores and is squeezing and crushing us simultaneously. It may seem like it, but the reality is that no human being has this kind of power over us. In most cases, the ex goes on about his business, and is nowhere in our proximity, yet we may still be hurting as if they were right there, abandoning the relationship all over again.

This is a vicious cycle of pain, and one of the best gifts we can give ourselves is to muster the courage and faith to step out of it. We need to confront our pain with the truth of God’s Word, so that God’s healing power can go down deep. Our Heavenly Father teaches us about how His healing begins in Hebrews 8:10(NLT). This verse reiterates God’s prophecy that was first given in the Old Testament to His prophet, Jeremiah. It states, “But this is the new covenant I will make with the people of Israel on that day, says the LORD: I will put my laws in their minds, and I will write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people.” For there to be a new covenant as Hebrews 8:10 tells us, there must be an old one. Our Heavenly Father gave the old covenant to His people living during Old Testament times, and He did so through His servant, Moses.

God wrote the Ten Commandments on two stone tablets. He commanded Moses to deliver the tablets to His people, but even while God was writing His commandments and meeting with Moses on Mount Sinai, the people had already violated them. When Moses came down, they had made an idol and were worshiping it. Moses later received a second set of tablets from God, but God’s people continued to violate His statutes and commandments, even after all the miraculous things He did for them. The psalmist wrote in Psalm 78:10(ESV), “They did not keep God’s covenant, but refused to walk according to his law.”

The old covenant is known as the Mosaic Covenant or Law of Moses, but God made a better covenant for us through Jesus Christ. Because of the finished work of the sacrifice and resurrection of Jesus Christ, God has poured out His Spirit on us. God’s truth is hidden in our hearts because He has given us His seed, the person of the Holy Spirit. Romans 8:16(NLT) tells us, “For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God’s children.” Make no mistake, we are much more powerful than we think, and this is because we are our Heavenly Father’s children. We are strong because He has made us strong, and we need to be confident in this.

Through His Spirit, God has written His Word on our hearts and minds. This means that we have all that we need on the inside to overcome. We can do it because God says we can. Philippians 2:13(NLT) tells us, “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” God is working in us, and we need to have faith in Him so that we can manifest all the good things that He’s planned for our lives. This is what we must remember when the emotional pain we experience seems too much to bear.

2Corinthians 12:9 teaches us that God’s grace is all we need. His power works best in weakness, and life will most certainly reveal this. Julianne literally almost fainted when Mark told her he wanted to take a break, and he ghosted her to the point of total disconnect. She had to be a different kind of woman to heal and become stronger, and although she didn’t think she had it in her, through the Holy Spirit, she most definitely did, and so do we. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“God’s Truth is Hidden in Our Hearts”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

A Stronghold in Times of Trouble

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Ephesians 4:32 (ESV)
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

Why am I in this situation? How in the world did I get here? While I was married to my husband, I asked myself these questions almost every day, but when we began the relationship, things weren’t as bad as they had become.  When we first started dating, he was kind, generous, and he always put me first. Our courtship lasted a year and then we got married. Of course, the first month was an adjustment period. We both had pretty established lives before we got married; our own places, good job security, and financial stability. I didn’t think the few disagreements after we moved in together were unusual, but after six months, small disagreements turned into days of not speaking to one another. I never believed I was the kind of woman to disrespect myself or my man, but his mental and emotional abuse was too much. It brought out things in me that I never knew existed, and I was at the lowest point of my life.

Every day, there are women going through the same things I did. Some are experiencing much more dangerous situations than disrespectful name calling and a hard shove here and there. The thing that becomes very clear to anyone in an abusive relationship is that once a certain level of respect is lost, things spiral down a dark hole very quickly. It seemed that my husband and I were almost near the bottom. It felt impossible that he would make a change and begin to honor me. Too many horrible things had been said and done. The treatment was indeed the bottom of the barrel, and I felt the only thing I could do was brace myself for more pain.

I started to struggle in my faith and doubt God’s love for me. I felt abandoned not only by my husband, but by God as well. “If God will allow this hurt and pain then what do I have left?” I asked myself. 2Corinthians 13:5(NIV) gives us the reality check that answers some of the most challenging questions of life, like the ones I had as I struggled to come to terms with my life. It tells us, “Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves.” When things are going well, most of us never question whether we are living by faith the way that God commands us to, but when life goes sideways, we choose the route that most do, which is to blame God for the conditions we’re facing.

Some will even think that God is punishing them and that they must endure the hardship and suffer. They erroneously think that this is what God wants. He doesn’t. In John 10:10(NKJV), Jesus Christ tells us what God wants for every person. He said, “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” God wants us to have a more than abundant life, and He sent His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to make this kind of life available to everyone.

God will help us during the most difficult times of our lives. Psalm 9:9 (ESV) tells us, “The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.” When our faith is not where it should be and we are not putting all our trust in God, He still helps us, but we need to know that His Will is that we learn to walk by faith in a greater way. God doesn’t want to be at the same level of faith from year to year. Colossians 2:6-7 tells us that He desires us to be rooted and built up in Christ, and we are to be established and going higher in faith in Him. God wants us to follow His Word so that we avoid relationships that will not yield the kind of love and support He wants His daughters to receive from their spouses. Having faith in God means that we believe it is possible to love and be loved according to the example of Christ.

Ephesians 5:25-28 (NIV) says, “25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” This is God’s standard. Of course, a wife must be equally as loving, kind, and respectful of her husband, but as women, we must know that God’s Will is for us to be loved and supported to this degree.

We must have faith that God is our stronghold in any condition and in every situation. Even when things seem impossible, Romans 8:28 tells us that He can turn them around and cause them to work together for our good, but we must be clear that He doesn’t want us to be mistreated just as He doesn’t want us to mistreat anyone either. It’s going to be necessary for us to hold up a mirror and examine ourselves. Self-reflection and being accountable to following the example of Christ is the best tool for anyone interested in living their best life.

Most of us spend our lives doing exactly what we want to do. Before we made consequential choices and decisions, we didn’t think to ask for God’s counsel or permission, and this method of approaching life will not yield the results we hope. Part of growing in faith is changing the way we think as we also pray for God’s guidance and direction. We also must develop a deeper well of love so that we are spiritually prepared to love others according to the example of Christ. Ephesians 4:32 teaches us that we are to be kind and forgive one another. This level of love for Jesus Christ and love and compassion for others is required to please God. It should be in our hearts way before we consider marriage. When it is, we will be better able to recognize and discern if a man does or doesn’t have the capacity to love us in the way that Christ does. ■

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

 “A Stronghold in Times of Trouble”, written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

You Are a Victor Not a Victim

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Micah 7:7-8 (NLT)
“As for me, I look to the LORD for help. I wait confidently for God to save me, and my God will certainly hear me.  Do not gloat over me, my enemies! For though I fall, I will rise again.  Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light.”

Hebrews 13:8 tells us that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He doesn’t have to change because he is perfect, and his love knows no boundaries. We, on the other hand, are works-in-progress. Change is the nature of our existence. God tells us in Ephesians 4:23 that our minds must be renewed. This means that we must change the way we think so that our thoughts line up with the thoughts of Jesus Christ. Learning information and behaviors is also a big part of what we humans do, and some of the information and behaviors we pick up along the way are the opposite of the thoughts and example of Christ. As we grow into adults, we discover that much of what we’ve picked up isn’t good for our souls. It is hurting us, and doing so big time, but some of us still will not change. That’s a problem.

The Word of God teaches us to live differently, not for the sake of simply doing so, but because changing the way we think, live, and behave according to the example of Jesus Christ will help us to be who God created us to be. That’s a really big deal, the biggest as a matter of truth. 2Timothy 3:16(NLT) tells us, “All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.” Our lives are not meant to be one big ball of confusion; they are supposed to make sense. The lens for making sense and for progress will always and forever be what God says, not what we or others say.

One of our biggest problems is that we try to set up our own systems of what is best for us, and that will lead us down an endless rabbit hole of darkness. God tells us in Proverbs 3:5(NLT) to “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.” He tells us this because He knows that most of us believe we can depend on our own understanding and be just fine. That’s not the case. We were created by our Heavenly Father to have an intimate relationship with Him. He made us in His image, and He knows what is necessary for our lives to flourish with wholeness, love, and joy. He tells us in Proverbs 3:5 to trust that, to trust Him with all that we are.

God also tells us in Proverbs 3:7 that we should not be impressed with our own wisdom, but instead we should turn from those things that do not please Him. This turning from things that displease Him is very challenging for some of us. We are sometimes overwhelmed by the circumstances of our lives, and we feel stuck, with no way to cope or bring about the change we desperately need. Everything around us seems to be moving at a shocking speed, but we’re feeling more isolated, sad, and immobile than we ever have.

Contemplating change in the middle of that can be daunting, but to help ourselves, we must give change some serious thought. The temptation to stay in or go back to the familiar is the struggle that blindsides our desire for happiness and wholeness, and the introduction of new patterns and behaviors is immediately rejected by a lot of us. We’re dug-in, even with abuse.

In 1Timothy 6:12(ESV), the Apostle Paul encourages us to “Fight the good fight of the faith.” He makes it clear to us that getting our minds and hearts on board with faith in Jesus Christ is a fight, but it’s a good fight. It’s the best fight in life. We all have our crosses to bear. We all have baggage that we are struggling to release. The thing we must recognize is that releasing the baggage is the goal, and God expects us to achieve it. He doesn’t abandon us in the fight, He helps us to win it!

That’s the mindset that moves us from victim to victor. It’s recognizing that God expects us to have the release, freedom, and victory in Christ always on our minds, and He expects us to believe these are available and possible for us. Philippians 4:6-7(NLT) tells us, “6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” The solution is not to try and carry the load ourselves. It’s to recognize that we can relinquish control and give everything to God in faith.

Let’s pray continually to remain flexible to God’s will and plan for our individual lives. His plan is a far better one than you and I can ever produce. Most importantly, let Jesus Christ take the wheel and be in the driver’s seat of your life. He is Lord! Truly believe this and let him build you up by learning about him through God’s Word. This will open your heart and mind to the changes you need to make. Then, with a thankful heart, have faith that he will lead you to victory and success as you walk in his peace everyday of your life.■

 Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“You Are a Victor Not a Victim”,  written for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2023. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!