Tag Archives: Love of Christ

A Quick, Crazy, Evil and Violating Thing

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It happened in a coat-check closet of a banquet hall of all places. I was happy to see a large mirror in it when I walked in to hang my coat. I’m always checking to see if I have lipstick on my teeth, it’s a thing with me. There were people coming in and out, but I made my way and stood in front of the mirror, checking my teeth first, and then proceeded to fix my hair a little bit. A guy I briefly made eye contact with standing in line suddenly appeared and bumped against me from behind. Before my mind could grasp what was happening, my body sensed something was very wrong. He maneuvered as if someone has pushed him in my direction, but that wasn’t the case. He pleasured himself and violated me in that instance. It happened so fast that I couldn’t calculate it, and when I turned around, he was gone.

When I returned to my seat, the look on my face indicated that something was wrong, and my friend was concerned. She asked me what happened, but I couldn’t get the words right. I tried to explain, but my explanation didn’t make sense. I shook my head, which she took to mean that she should just let it be, but really it signaled my overwhelming sense of disbelief.

I did what so many do when they are victimized in this way, I questioned myself a million times in a million different ways. There was nothing unusual or suggestive in the eye contact I made with this man, yet, I still questioned myself repeatedly. It’s an old habit from childhood that, for me, has been challenging to break. Children who grow up in abusive homes sometimes blame themselves for the abuse they suffer. They desperately want to be loved and will do anything to keep believing in their parents; even to the point of faulting themselves.

Intellectually, I knew this thing wasn’t my fault, but old programming got the better of me. It was a quick, crazy, evil and violating thing that happened, but at the time, it was something I had never heard of. So, I didn’t tell anyone what happened, fearing they might not believe me. I was used to suffering in silence, and that’s what I did. As time went on, what I began to understand is that the painful and silent thing has a voice, and it speaks in ways that our mouths could never articulate. My anger and sorrow about what happened to me manifested itself in physical ailments, extreme sadness at times, and a neglect of self.

I had a few mountains in my life in the past, and this violation became another one that I needed to conquer. I was sinking, becoming more bitter and angry, and I decided that instead of continuing to drown in my emotional pain, I would dive deeper into the Lord than I had before.  

1Peter 1:6-7(NLT) says, “6 So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. 7 These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.” God doesn’t cause our problems and tribulations, but He will always help us through them, strengthening our faith and making us stronger than before.

Some people will do evil things. They will take the free-will gift of God and do horrendously vile deeds with it. As much as we’d all probably like to forget this, we can’t. But we don’t have to focus on it. Instead, we can focus on the reality that God loves us so much that He gave His only begotten Son to save us. We mean this much to Him, and because of what He’s done for us through Christ, we have a choice. We don’t have to let those who refuse to know God’s love destroy our desire to live by it.

In 2 Chronicles 7:14(NLT), God said that if we humble ourselves, pray, seek Him, and turn away from wrongdoing, He’ll hear our prayers; He’ll forgive our sins and restore us. Yes, we get knocked down, and sometimes it’s a pretty hard hit, but God is a healer of brokenness. If we allow His Spirit to work within our hearts, and be willing to surrender bitterness and anger to Him, we will always get back up stronger and more determined to live love through the power of His strength.■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“A Quick, Crazy, Evil and Violating Thing”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Nothing Stays Hidden for Long

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A friend of mind would drive herself nuts with hair and make-up. It was beyond anything I’d ever seen. She’d fall for every new trend and claim about the secret to beauty and youth, and she bought an insane amount of products; most of which she never used. Her hair was always impeccable, every strand seemingly in place. Many of us are more than a little conscious regarding our appearance, but she seemed obsessive and just about everyone close to her knew that something wasn’t quite right. The pressure to look perfect often caused her to be emotionally distraught because she couldn’t meet the unachievable standards that she had set for herself. Sometimes, when we’re overly consumed with one area of our lives in this way, it is because we’re neglecting another. When the area we’re neglecting is spiritual, we’re moving in really dangerous territory.

When insecurities play out through obsessiveness, it could be tied to our need to fill a void. None of us like hearing this because it means we have to confront some things internally, and soul-work is not always easy work. One thing is for sure, we only live on this earth once, and if we’re going to make the most of it, we’re going to have address the things that hold us back. Blockers not only keep us from experiencing the life we’re entitled to live, but they cause us to lose precious momentum on this journey. No matter how much we try to avoid dealing with them, God designed life in such a way that the lessons of surrender and release will be on repeat until we either get them or die.

We’ve tried convincing my friend of her attractiveness, telling her she doesn’t need procedures and other things. She’d quickly change the subject, ignore our comments, or become frustrated. The words we spoke were a whisper compared to the loudness of her shame and insecurity. When Adam and Eve disobeyed God in the Garden of Eden, sin consciousness entered their psyche. No one knows exactly how long they had lived prior to eating of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, but once they did, time entered the picture and so did death, fear, and shame. We know this because before they disobeyed God, Genesis 2:25(KJV) tells us, “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.”  After they sinned, Genesis 3:6(NLT) says, “The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. 7 At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness.”

This clearly allows us to see that shame is felt when something we want to hide is exposed. What ends up happening is that many of us will deflect, ignore, change the subject or do worse to make sure the hidden thing stays this way. It’s painful. We don’t want to feel it, and we don’t want others to get near it. The thing about life is that we’re here on this earth to learn some lessons that are uniquely crafted for each of our individual spiritual journeys. We can try to run, but we definitely can’t hide from them. If we don’t summon the courage to confront what we haven’t conquered, sooner or later, our inner pain will be exposed, and most of the time it ain’t pretty.

Make no mistake, God’s Word tells us we’re born with sin in our bodies, and we’re born into a sinful world. A lifetime isn’t long enough to confront every dark thing in our souls, because all of us have junk in our trunks. But to the extent that we’re so consumed with licking our wounds and feeding our insecurities that we’re not moving forward in our purpose; we’ve got to deal with the issue.

A person’s purpose is tied to the very core of who they were created to be. It’s woven in God’s plan for the entire universe, and everything in creation knows when we’re out of alignment with it. This is why God’s divine design exposes darkness, so that it can be brought to the light. Jesus Christ said in Luke 8:17(NLT), “For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open, and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made known to all.” You can’t conquer what you refuse to confront. God doesn’t expect us to deal with it by ourselves, because we can’t. He wants us to invite His love to do a work within, so we don’t have to continue ducking and hiding. We can let the thing that keeps us from loving fully to come front and center, so we can surrender it and accept the love of Christ in its place. ■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Nothing Stays Hidden for Long”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

“Clean-Up” Women with Dirty Hearts

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Growing up, I knew a group of women who never waited for permission to go after what they wanted. This was especially true when it came to men. It really didn’t matter all that much whether the man was married or in a relationship. If they took a fancy or the man seemed interested, they’d do whatever it took to take him from the woman he was with. Their mentality about this was cavalier to say the least. They figured if the woman wasn’t on top of her game, doing everything she could to keep the man satisfied and happy at home, she deserved to have him swept up by another woman. In an odd way, I marveled at the dichotomy of these women. On the surface they were very unassuming, and at times quite nice; but boy could they be ruthless. And the fact that they were not beautiful or particularly well-versed made the results of their audacity even more uncanny.

They were known as “clean-up” women, no doubt because of the cutthroat way they swept up a man, and did so to such a degree that not even a hint of him was left for his ex. When I think of them now, I think of what God says in Jeremiah 17:9(NLT), “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?” These women were both insidious in their motives and actions. I would hear my grandmother say of them, “God don’t like ugly.” She was not referring to the aesthetics of their faces, but the content of their character and the way they disregarded families, children, and the mothers and wives who had struggled to hold it all together.

The ‘clean-up’ women in my town had many children and raised their girls to employ the same tactics they had used themselves. Other women that I knew feared they might have their husbands and boyfriends swept up. As I grew older, I inherited the same sort of fear. Long after I moved away from my hometown, I became ever so aware that clean-up women were not restricted to the area where I was raised. I dare say, they are in every town and city, sucking up leftovers and crumbs from what used to be a feast of matrimonial unity, and they leave no trace of Christian sisterhood in their wake.

Because of some of the devastation I saw, loyalty in a man was something I knew I had to have in a mate. I became relentless about it, and any sign of infidelity on his part was an immediate termination for me. I just couldn’t deal. The premise behind my stance is a good one, because God doesn’t want any of His children being treated disrespectfully, but the motivating factor for my stance was fear. It was the fear of being swindled out of my happiness by another woman’s selfish agenda. I had seen it happen many times, and I was adamant not to allow it to touch my life in any way.

Job, a righteous man who lived in Old Testament times, endured tremendous hardship in his life. In Job 3:25(NLT), he said, “What I always feared has happened to me. What I dreaded has come true.” Fear brings a snare. Proverbs 29:25 tells us that fearing people is a dangerous trap. It draws out the very situations and circumstances we don’t want. Fear does not come from the Kingdom of God, it comes from the kingdom of satan, who is the father of lies, deceit, death, darkness, and hate. God tells us in 1John 4:18 that there is no fear in love, because perfect love will cast out fear; it will squash it. God’s love is perfect. His love is the glue that binds a relationship together in Christ, and it is the safety net that surrounds a family with impenetrable unity. Our responsibility is to have unwavering faith in God’s love, and the only way to do this is to learn about who He is.

God tells us in Hosea 4:6 that His people are destroyed because they lack knowledge. They are not interested in knowing more about His love, power, and grace. This is what leaves them exposed to the clean-up tricks of those sent by the evil one. The verse in Proverbs 29:25 warns us not to fear people, but to trust God because this brings safety. It doesn’t mean that our relationships will be perfect. People make mistakes, and sometimes men lose their senses and think for a minute that the grass is greener on the other side, but we serve a powerful and extraordinary God. No problem is too big for Him. We can’t be so concerned about someone cleaning-up where they’ve got no business. Our focus should be locked on keeping our own hearts free of fear and full of faith, so that we can continue to grow in Christ. We must be confident that if we do our part, God will most certainly do His.■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Clean-Up” Women with Dirty Hearts”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!


Choosing the Right Person

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One of the most valuable lessons in life is learning the importance of allowing God’s direction and guidance in our significant relationships. Most of us don’t think we need any help in this area, but nothing could be further from the truth. It’s an integral piece of our overall lives and hugely impacts our relationship with God. Choosing the wrong person will cause us to lose time, resources, and momentum on this journey. Resources and momentum we can regain, but time is lost forever. There’s also the potential injury to our souls, and possibly the other person’s, that could occur when we’ve chosen poorly. In a perfect scenario, we’d ascertain rather quickly whether the person we’re jonesing for isn’t our destiny partner, and we’d cut’em loose with no animosity whatsoever. We’d wish them well and send them on their way with God’s grace. For many of us, that ain’t the case.

We latch on and make emotional investments into people because they have within them something that moves us. But just because someone moves us soulfully, it doesn’t mean they’re our soulmates. Many of us are so busy responding to the situations of our lives that we haven’t taken the time to truly know ourselves better. We haven’t taken out our trusty tools of exploration like brutal honesty and truth to go soul digging beyond the surface. So, nine times out of ten, we respond strongly to someone and go all in, when all they’ve done is simply skimmed the surface of our souls. They’ve touched a note, but haven’t a clue about the whole song, and neither do we.  

Jesus Christ said in John 3:16 (NLT), “For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” Because of the finished work of Christ, you and I are eternal beings through him. This means we’ll be around for a really, really, really long time. There are parts of us we’ve never known. Our spirits were made brand new in Christ, and a lifetime on earth isn’t enough to explore the wonder of our new creation. We couldn’t possibly get to the depth of all that we are, but God knows us through and through. David, the psalmist, wrote in Psalm 139:1-5(NLT): “1O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. 2 You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. 3 You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. 4 You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. 5 You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.”

God saw our end before we ever got started. He’s mapped out a plan for us that lays a foundation for you and I to get better and stronger—to tap into the depth of our greatness in Christ, to bask and make ourselves at home in his goodness and love. He’ll prevent us from intercepting this flow if we’ll humble ourselves before Him.

It takes humility to pause and consider the possibility that we’re about to bust a move that’s not in tune with God’s plan. Many us begin relationships without giving this a second thought. Jesus Christ teaches us that the quality of humility is a non-negotiable one when it comes to the Kingdom of God. No matter our ages, we are all children to Heavenly Father, because this is what He created us to be. Make no mistake, we’re extremely intelligent and capable creatures. Ephesians 2:10(NLT) tells us, “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” God calls us His greatest work, but we must always remember that the creation isn’t greater than the Creator. When we get this twisted, humility goes out the window.

When we cross paths with a person that is right for us, God will confirm it many times if we are patient and humbled enough to seek Him and accept His wisdom. He is very interested in our relationships, and He desires us to be happy. He knows exactly what we need to fulfill our purpose and walk the path of destiny He’s laid before us. Humility begs us to not always trust our hearts but to trust the Lord! Job 12:13(NLT) declares, “But true wisdom and power are found in God; counsel and understanding are his.” He will never steer us wrong.■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Choosing the Right Person”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Dissipating the Dark Cloud of Sadness

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“The human spirit can endure a sick body,
but who can bear a crushed spirit?” Proverbs 18:14 (NLT)

Anyone who has taken steps toward healing wounds left from the trauma of domestic violence and abuse can speak to the residual emotional pain it causes. A person can move past the situations and conditions where they were exposed to abuse. We can put it long behind us, but this doesn’t mean that we’re healed and delivered from the effects of it. You can be doing your own thing, going about your humdeedumdum business, and all of a sudden, “WHAMMM!!!” It hits you like a ton of bricks. It’s an avalanche of heaviness that looms over your life like a dark cloud, and it just knocks you for a loop. You can’t shake it, and you can’t explain why you feel so bad.

It is almost unheard of to expect a child, 4 or 5 years of age, to lead a company of soldiers into combat or to go to work every day and support an entire family. Most mature and intelligent individuals understand these are unreasonable expectations for a person so young. It is, however, conceivable that a child could have the mental prowess for extraordinary accomplishments, but he or she wouldn’t have the emotional or physical development to carry out such things. Most of us can certainly fathom the absurdity in placing overwhelming burdens on a young one, but when it comes to the overburdening that we have experienced, some of us are not nearly as compassionate as we should be toward ourselves.

In Matthew 11:28-30, Our precious Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” One of the reasons that millions fall madly in love with Jesus Christ is because the record of him in the bible testifies of his goodness. He walked upon this earth being both fully human and fully God. He’s our High Priest, and Hebrews 4:15 says that he was tempted in every way that a human can be, but never sinned. This verse tells us that he understands what we go through. He has intimate knowledge of our weaknesses and shortcomings.

Jesus Christ is brilliant, all-powerful, and supremely intelligent. He would not tell us to do something unless it is absolutely necessary for us to get it done. He knows that we’re going to go through things in life that will completely overwhelm our mental and emotional resources. He also knows that the burden of those experiences is too much for us to carry. As a way of preserving ourselves, many of us buried those feelings long ago. We pressed them down deep and may not have realized we did this. The thing is, nothing stays buried unless it’s dead. Residual pain and sadness from traumatic experiences doesn’t die. It must be released, and this is a process that our Lord and Savior will help us walk through.

For years too many to number, believers have suffered sadness in silence. Many were too ashamed to speak their own personal truth about what they’ve endured, and for some, pain is buried so deep that they’re unable to call a spade a spade. Like me, they wake up one morning not wanting to face the day and not knowing why. If you’ve suffered prior abuse or any traumatic event and you’re experiencing overwhelming sadness, it is very important that you know it’s possible to dissipate the dark cloud over your life. It doesn’t happen overnight, but it does happen. My prayer is that you will ask the Lord Jesus Christ for help and trust him to divinely heal you from the inside out through his healing power and amazing love. Pray that he will also connect you with Godly people, relationships, and resources that will help you fully embrace his light and remain in it continually.■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Dissipating the Dark Cloud of Sadness”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Sometimes, You Just Gotta’ Be A Ninja

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As I stood behind the podium in front of people from various religious backgrounds, I made a statement that is central to the core of who I am as a believer. “We cannot be the same people we were two years ago, two months ago, or two weeks ago. We must be always growing and abounding in Christ—responding to the new mercies of God that greet us every morning.” When I wrote this statement some days before, I believed it to be revolutionary; because discovering the revelation of it truly had been life changing for me. I was in church all my life. I was surrounded by a wonderful community of people who I believed were genuinely committed to me and the other youths they mentored. But as an adult, I became very weary of sameness. I believed there was so much more to life in the Spirit than what I had personally and previously witnessed. I yearned to see God’s power phenomenally manifested in my life, and when it showed up for me, I couldn’t help but tell it.

Standing there, looking at those who had just heard my words, I expected to sense in my spirit a pulling for more. It’s the spirit to spirit tugging that occurs when the souls of folks are captivated. It happens when people hear words that they’ve been waiting to hear all their lives. But as I gazed about, and checked my radar for take-off, it became blatantly clear that they were not willing to travel with me. In fact, most looked at me as if I had two heads. Only just starting out back then, I was bruised and a little bit embarrassed, but the Lord was not finished with me. In truth He had just begun. It took me a while to snap back after this incident, but the Lord was patient, and I continued to pursue Him for more.

This happened some years ago, but we live in an environment that is quite different today. We no longer have the luxury of settling into a posture of letting disappointment run its course. Everything in the world is moving at an accelerated pace, and God is up to something; most of us can feel this in our spirits. What does it all mean? Well, the Apostle Paul reminds us in Hebrew 12:1 that God has given us some fantastic examples of faith to emulate. He tells us that since the Father has given us these extraordinary witnesses, we’d better strip off every weight that slows us down, because like them, God’s given us a race to run. No time to play around because this race is heating up. Our only option is to heat up with it. We’ve got to get busy making sure we’re responding to what the Father is doing.  

The whole business of being an earth-dweller is to respond to God as the sons and daughters He’s made us. When I first understood this years ago, I was excited as all get out! It was thrilling to learn that I’m not here to rest on my laurels in a take-it-as-it-comes existence. In John 5:17,19(NLT) Jesus Christ said, “17 My Father is always working, and so am I. 19 I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does.” This is our mission—our modus operandi. It takes humility in the form of flexibility to respond to God, because we’ve got to do what we see Him doing. He’s calling upon each of us to break out of sameness and look up. If we don’t, we’re going to miss out.

Time is of the essence. Heavenly Father whispered in our ears years ago to get rid of some things—to do a Jiu Jitsu on those old fears, toxic relationships, and negative habit patterns, so we can respond to Him with the love He deserves. Many of us haven’t done it. And the reason is because we are so strapped into who we think we should be that we’re not becoming who God destined us to be. We’re out of synch with our identities, and everything around us is a reminder of this. Don’t let the roots of old dead things continue to suck up your good energy. Sometimes, you just gotta be a ninja. Chop em’ off and do it quickly so newness can bloom. Get rid of that stuff. You’ve got a race to run, and you shouldn’t let anything keep you from being all that God has destined you to be. ■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Sometimes, You Just Gotta’ Be A Ninja”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Heaven’s Idea of a Good Mate

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The most important piece of truth that we can know about finding a good mate is that God desires it more for us than we desire it for ourselves. He wants us to squeeze as much happiness out of life as we possibly can. The Godhead bodily is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit; each is equally God. Although they have different functions, the relationship between the Father, His Son, and His Spirit is so unified by love that they are One. Jesus Christ said about the Holy Spirit in John 16:15(NLT), “The Spirit will tell you whatever he receives from me.” Jesus Christ points to the Father and the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit points to God the Father and Jesus Christ; and God the Father points to His Son, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. None of them singling out themselves only but giving glory to the other. Their relationship is beyond beautiful! And although you and I can’t fully comprehend it, we know from God’s Word that relationship means everything to Him. Therefore, He knows how important it is to us as well.

1Corinthians, Chapter 13 is known to many people as the ‘love’ chapter, because it is in this chapter that God defines what love is and how it behaves. He tells us that love is patient, kind, and not jealous. It isn’t egotistical, proud or self-aggrandizing. It’s not rude or irritable, and it doesn’t demand its own way. Love keeps no record of wrong doing, doesn’t rejoice in injustice, but rejoices whenever the truth wins. It never gives up, never loses faith, and is always hopeful. Love endures and will last forever!

This is God’s brand of love and it is extraordinary without doubt. In 1Corinthians 13:4-7, He’s given us a standard in hopes that we will fall in love with it. He wants us to pursue His kind of love and not rest until we have obtained it. In our pursuing, we will see that God’s whole mission is to build us up so that we learn to love ourselves, not by criticizing our flaws, but by continuing to focus on that which is best in us. The best in us is always going to be the love that comes from God. 1John 4:13-14 tells us that we know we’re living steadily and deeply in Him, and He in us, because He’s given us what He is—He’s given us His Spirit—His very essence. It doesn’t matter who we are, if we love with the heart of God, He loves through us. Heaven’s idea of a good mate is someone that allows you to do just that.

In Luke 6:37-38, Jesus Christ tells us not to jump on the failures of others or criticize their faults, because if we do this, we’ll receive the same treatment. He tells us not to kick those that are down, because this hardness of heart will boomerang right back on us. The astounding piece of wisdom he reveals is that the thing we put out there is the thing we get back. This is a big piece of meat to chew on, because it puts the responsibility for the quality of love we extend squarely on our shoulders. It requires us to graduate from baby formula and bring our fork and knife to the table.

God knows our destinies. He knows our futures, and He wants to present us with the most loving and wonderful mate, because that’s what He has in store for us. He also knows we’ve had a few issues in the past. We didn’t deal with a few things as honestly and humbly as we should have. The love we gave out was sometimes shrouded in selfishness, and this is what He wants us to see. He wants our eyes opened to the fullness of His love, because when they are, His Spirit has free reign to work within us, so that we receive the same quality love we give. ■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Heaven’s Idea of a Good Mate”  written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Achieving Inner Peace

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“Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you.” Isaiah 54:10 (NIV)

I met Ms. Sharon when I was a teenager, visiting my aunt during the summer months in Denver, Colorado. I fell in love with her from the moment I saw her. She reminded me of my aunts back home, and boy could sister-girl throw down in the kitchen. Her fried chicken was everything. Ms. Sharon was my cousin’s sitter in the evenings when his mom worked, and anyone who knew him would think this the most unenviable job of all. I had never known a more mischievous boy than my cousin, Zach. Once, while he visited family down south, he made my Aunt Eula so mad that she pushed aside her walker and chased him around the entire house. After meeting Ms. Sharon, I thought surely he would have driven her crazy too, but as the days went on, I witnessed the most remarkable thing. He was still a little rascal, but around her he was kitten; doing everything orderly, just as she instructed. In my eyes, this was a bona fide miracle.

I didn’t know what Ms. Sharon had, but I wanted some of it. As I got older and matured, I often thought of her example. There was grace in even her mundaneness, and everything about her seemed to exude peace. I never heard her raise her voice with Zach, and this was a response he provoked from just about everyone else, and he enjoyed it; but not with Ms. Sharon. She had what so many proclaim to possess, but never quite walk in it. She had authority, because she truly believed that the love of Christ is at the center of it. The peace of God effortlessly flowed from her being and demanded everything around her to fall in alignment; even Zach.  

Philippians 4:7(NIV) says, “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Peace is defined as having a steadiness of mind and heart regardless of external disturbances. Sometimes we find ourselves struggling to have this level of peace. Often, it is because we don’t go to the Source. God’s peace transcends ALL understanding. We can’t reason with it or try to squeeze the heft of its calm into our little boxes of logic. God’s peace requires a surrender—a total surrender, and this means that the flesh doesn’t get its way.

We can’t have faith and fear at the same time. And we can’t have inner peace and chaos at the same time. We, you and I, have to make a choice. Either we’re going to believe that God wants us to be peaceful, and that He’ll work in our hearts and minds to bring us His peace, or we won’t. If we choose God’s peace, then we’re going to have to trust that He sees all and knows best. He’ll lead us on a peaceful path. Not choosing this path is where some of us run into serious trouble.

Everything isn’t going to be rosy all the time. Jesus Christ didn’t promise that it would be. We don’t get to do all the things the flesh finds pleasurable. I’m sure Ms. Sharon could have thought of a million other things she’d rather be doing than sitting with Zach each day, but she knew she was called by God to care for him—to invest in his life, and to make sure he understood that someone believed in his potential.

Heavenly Father proved that He wants us to live a good life. He gave us His Son, Jesus Christ, and his sacrifice is the greatest gift ever given in all of eternity. We can be our best for God because He has given us the best; this is undeniable. He’ll only tell us to do those things that promote peace and well-being in our lives. The prophet said in Isaiah 26:3(NLT), “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!” Often inner chaos comes because we’re not trusting God or doing the things that He’s told us to do. But if we’ll anchor our minds and surrender to the path of His perfect peace, we will see that everything in our lives will begin to follow.■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

“Achieving Inner Peace” written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

 

The Breaker Anointing

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“But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” Hebrews 11:6(NKJV)

I believe one of the reasons Heavenly Father has called me to write about His Word is to remove some of the stigmas and overcomplications. His Word is truth! His Word is transparent, but through the years, those with selfish agendas have tried to add to it in some places and take away from it in others. My aim is to help present it in a way that the sheer simplicity and power of His truth is revealed. The ‘Breaker Anointing’ is an ordination of God for the blessing of His people, and it isn’t nearly as complicated as some have made it. I was particularly struck by this as I thought about my friend that I’ll call Ruby for the sake of anonymity. She has left an indelible mark on my consciousness. Like me, she grew up in a home where domestic violence and abuse was prevalent. When I think of what we both endured, I am amazed any human could or would inflict such pain and fear upon someone defenseless. I’m convinced the devil tried to destroy my destiny by possessing the person who oppressed me. The depth of gratitude to God for having saved me both physically and spiritually through the Lord Jesus Christ can’t be expressed with mere words.

It is by the grace of God that I’m able to write about what I know of Ruby’s life. As bad as I believed things were for me, I think the level of abuse she suffered was far worse. After years of going through it, I walked away sane; she did not. Although we were both raised in the church, Ruby and I knew nothing of a ‘breaker anointing’, had never even heard of it.

The two words alone convey something pretty powerful, and certainly our circumstances desperately needed that kind of intervention. But this does not diminish at all the grace God showed us during those years. Given the dysfunction of our oppressors, our lives could have been wiped-out in a second on several occasions, but they weren’t, and we both managed to live through it.

Taking care of an ailing mother and younger siblings, Ruby was forced to be an adult way before her time. In Hosea 4:6, God says that His people are destroyed because they lack knowledge. From this, you and I can know that human-beings can be severely harmed or snuffed-out because of what they don’t know. Ignorance is darkness. It is imprisonment. Ruby was so busy taking care of folks and doing chores that school was her only escape, except she indulged play way more than she did education. She was so imprisoned by ignorance she couldn’t see that enlightenment is the key. And not just any enlightenment, but the kind that comes from Christ. It sets us free!

Jesus Christ is the subject of the entire Bible. He is the fulfillment of God’s promise to the world. He said of himself in Luke 4:18(NLT), “The Spirit of the LORD is upon me, for he has anointed me to bring Good News to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the oppressed will be set free.” The truth of what this verse conveys is exponentially richer than any of us can fathom. Christ IS the Breaker! His love and power break every chain of bondage in a person’s life. Often our issue regarding seeing his power manifested is one of cooperation.

Hebrews 11:6 tells us that we cannot please God without faith, and Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing the good news about Jesus Christ. Faith comes by hearing knowledge; the kind of knowledge that if allowed entrance into our hearts, will transfer us from darkness to light, and transform us into the people God desires us to be. One of the reasons that it is so uber important to know about the example and ministry of Christ is because he walked this earth fully God and fully human. By this, you and I can be confident that restoration is both supernatural and natural, working together. Jesus Christ, both God and man, demonstrated the potency of this collaboration.

The breaker anointing delivered by Christ through his love and power isn’t just for those who are religious. It’s not just for those who look to be perfect or think themselves deserving of special titles. It is for anyone that is willing to present all that they are to God—burdens and weaknesses. It’s for those who will learn from Christ what it means to walk this earth as a human with his supernatural love and power sealed on the inside of them. And it is for those who want to be free of the shackles of pain and brokenness from the past. He offers his delivering power freely to us, and although it saddens me that Ruby couldn’t enjoy the fullness of it, I am so monumentally grateful that he delivered it to me. He’ll do the same for you. Let him be your Breaker. ■

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“The Breaker Anointing” written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

Dealing with Overwhelming Disappointment

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“So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you. ” Deuteronomy 31:6 (NLT)

Disappointment is defined as the emotion of sadness a person feels because of the nonfulfillment of their hopes or expectations. As I read the definition, I’m struck by the dichotomy of how simple the definition reads and how severely disappointment can impact our hearts. Sometimes our souls are wounded from it to such a degree that we’re never quite the same. There’s a saying that “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” It’s cliché-ish, but oh so true. But no one wants to think about being stronger when your heart is aching, your confidence is blown to smithereens, and the thing you counted on or the person you thought had your back let you down big time.

As survivors of domestic violence and abuse, many of us have learned not to have high expectations. Your mind and heart will respond very surprisingly when they are conditioned this way. We’ll sometimes convince ourselves that God will not help us because of what we’ve gone through. We might make the mistake of thinking that He is punishing us for some reason, or that He doesn’t care enough to rescue us from disappointing circumstances. This isn’t the case at all. 1Peter 5:7 tells us to give all our worries and cares to God, because He cares for us. God loves us, and He wants to help.

Timothy was a disciple of the Apostle Paul, and Paul loved him like a son. Timothy endured disappointment because things in the church he was overseeing were not going the way he had hoped. He was a bit shy, and a very diligent and trustworthy person. Paul said that assignments given to Timothy would be carried out as thoroughly as if he had done them himself. But with this church, Timothy felt overwhelmed and became fearful to execute the spiritual gifts he had been given.

In our daily lives, we may not have the huge responsibility that Timothy had back in those biblical times, but we know how it feels to want something to succeed and yet have it fail. We know how hurtful it can be when those who are supposed to care about us speak negatively to us or behind our backs. It just breaks your heart and you want to crawl under a rock somewhere.

The encouragement that the Apostle Paul gave Timothy is the same encouragement we need in order to overcome overwhelming disappointment. In 2Timothy 1:6, Paul told him to stir up the gift of God that was in him. He reminded Timothy of his obligation to respond to God in faith, and to remember that God had equipped him to confront and overcome any adversity.

Disappointment can prompt us to shut down and close ourselves off to hope and faith; but we must not give in to this. Paul knew human nature. He knew how paralyzing disappointment can be, and he didn’t want Timothy to retreat into the darkness of fear. He had to make him remember what God has given to everyone who walks in Christ. In 2Timothy 1:7(NIV) he wrote, “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.”

God doesn’t want the disappointments and hurts we experience to get the best of us. But He does want us to see the areas where we have allowed our spiritual lives to cool down. He wants us to notice that we might not be praying and talking to Him as much as we used to, or maybe our priorities have slipped; we’re more enthusiastic about what is happening externally than we are about what is happening internally. He’s reminds us to stir up the gift within, to remember who we are and whose we are. Only God can give us a sense of assurance, and when we focus our attention on Him and His promises, our spiritual lives will be strengthened. We can then view the other side of disappointment, and how we’re bolder and stronger for having overcome it.■

THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

“Dealing with Overwhelming Disappointment” written by Fran, edited by PMB for DomesticAbuseAwareness.Org ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!